Oh but you never thought I started a blog to wail and howl about life, now did you? Rainbows and glitter are no fun on your own, I enjoy things best when I share. And…if you also are an experienced hell-dweller, then I know you have your down and no-energy days too. Anything that may bring a little smile to your face or help you make it through the day, I’ll try to share things that make me happy or help me survive too.
The first, easiest thing I can share is Veronica Walsh’s CBT Blog. Cognitive Behavior Therapy or Dialectic Behavior Therapy are extremely helpful for anyone who has suffered abuse. The negative talk and thoughts just become so much a part of you that you may not even notice it. Just becoming aware of the negative way you see yourself and talk to yourself can make a difference. It’s not easy, but it can be a lifeline. When I first realized that AH didn’t/couldn’t love me or take care of me it hit like a brick that the only person who could take care of me was…me. Trying to learn to take care of myself while thinking I was useless, stupid, worthless was kinda counter-productive. Not sayin’ that Veronica Walsh has all the answers, but it’s one very good resource to begin to change ingrained thought and language patterns.
Probably the biggest rainbow in helping me survive any day is music. I probably couldn’t express here exactly how much music means to me and how it has repeatedly saved my life. My taste is varied ~ some genres I have near encyclopedic knowledge of, others I simply enjoy what floats into my ears. There are few styles of music that I’m not keen on, but my mind is always open so anyone with serious suggestions, I’ll be happy to have a listen! My motor runs primarily on:
- Japanese pop ~ with a huge weak spot for idol pop~, rock & visual kei. Idol-wise, verything from Candies, Pink Lady, HikaGen, SMAP, News, Kis-My-Ft2 to AKB48 and Momoiro Clover Z. Everything else…too many to mention but let’s say Yuzu, Mr Children, SID, LM.C, Golden Bomber, BREAKERZ, Angela Aki, B’z, Fukuyama Masaharu and World Order keep my planet spinning.
- Late 1970’s – 1980’s (primarily) British new wave/alternative (but I also like US groups like Talking Heads and Blondie)
- Spanish-language pop & rock (Juanes, Gustavo Cerati/Soda Stereo, Julieta Venegas, Aleks Syntek..)
- Turkish folk & pop (Barış Manço, Sertab Erener, Mustafa Sandal, Ebru Gündeş..)
- Celticy, mostly Scottish Celtic like Capercaillie, Silly Wizard and Tannahill Weavers but Ashley MacIssac has also been known to get me to groove. Irish Celtic has its place too.
- A teensy weensy part of me has a very embarrassed Inner Disco Queen who thinks that ABBA were kind of cool. She only comes out when the moon is waxing gibbous though, so we’re mostly safe.
- Michael Jackson. I think it’s a Japanese thing?
So with all that music love, depending on the day there is always something playing in the background keeping me sane. My kids love karaoke games and I do love singing with them too. It often takes a lot to get past my shyness and sing into the microphone…why is it so different singing along to the stereo and singing into a karaoke mic??? Mostly I find that I feel a lot better when I sing too though.
Just a few tools in my Survival Kit, having a variety makes it easier to get through assorted days.