AH had therapy yesterday so I took the chance to do a little shopping. I walked past the video game section of the store and heard two kids, probably brothers, ~ one about eleven and the other probably seven, looking at and talking about the video game display. Their interaction charmed me. The older brother asked his brother’s opinion and interests. The younger brother considered his older brother’s feelings too. So many times kids can’t help but grab my attention when I’m shopping.
I’m trying to move my trolley around the one sitting in the middle of the aisle.
I’m trying not to hit the li’l tyke barreling towards me.
I’m trying to hear AH or one of my children over the screams of a bored, miserable child whose parent is more engaged with a phone conversation than the child in front of him/her.
These boys reminded me of when my children were younger. I have a lot of complaints about growing up an abused child but one thing I did learn was how I didn’t want to be treated.
What broke my heart.
What made me stop trying.
And when I became a parent myself I tried so very hard to interact with my own kids as if they were the humans they were. Not sub-humans. Not alien species. Humans. People who had thoughts, dreams, feelings and hopes too. I’ll wait until my kids are grandparents to shout victory but I kinda think it’s worked so far. They treat each other with respect. They consult each other. They consider each other’s feelings and morals. They’re amazing people that I actually enjoy being around.
Not long after I noticed the boys, their parents came up…Mom was waving a book and said, “look what I found for us to read together”.
When my children were small I had strangers come up and compliment me on how well my kids behaved. I couldn’t really take any credit, the kids were the ones in charge of their actions. But I think it’s because I respected them that they behaved that way, at least a little bit?
I caught the mother’s attention ~ her face wasn’t too open at first. I told them: Your boys are awesome, it’s been encouraging hearing them interact with each other.
It was wonderful to see their smiles. I hoped they felt as good as I did when people encouraged me.
I wish I’d said…
It’s evident you really love and respect your boys because they have been mirroring that behavior to one another.
I’d encourage others..it’s way too easy to notice the kids that get our attention for the wrong reasons. Maybe if you see children behaving nicely, maybe it wouldn’t hurt to let the parents know that their work is appreciated. The smiles I saw yesterday make me smile today.
Not a bad return for a few kind words.